Confrontation does not have to be a “bad word,” or a negative event. It can be healing. Whether you are 15 or 48 or 99. I know it does not change the past. I even know the other person (an abuser, a boss, a friend… whomever) may not perceive things in the same way you do or even care. But that is not the point. It’s about taking your power back and gaining some kind of control over a situation that during the time, you had no control over.
Control is important for survivors of trauma because when the event occurred, we had none. We felt helpless, worthless, shame, guilt… many negative feelings and maladaptive thoughts. For me, in confrontation, I am turning all of those into some kind of understanding which results in a more positive feeling. With confrontation, nightmares went away and my self-confidence increased. Do not have any expectations about the other person you are confronting. It’s not about them. It’s about you, and your healing. And you, my friend, matter.